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Setting Boundaries And Having Them Respected

For the past year or so, I have been working on setting boundaries.

And, for those who actively set boundaries, I am curious to know whether you have been met with any resistance by those who “claim to love you?”

I know I have. In a big way. And, by family especially…

None of my family have good boundaries. And, I have had to put boundaries on nearly every one of my relationships with family.

The outcome has not been good.

Communication has gone by the way side between a handful of family members and I, and there’s either nothing I can do, or am willing to do, about it.

Just the other day, a family member I trusted, gave me the third degree about my mental illness.

They made all sorts of “incorrect” assumptions about me, my life, and the trajectory of chronic schizoaffective disorder.

It was a sad scene, and I didn’t fully realize their iill ntentions until the next day when I replayed the situation in my head, and subsequently discussed it with my wife.

Why would someone, anyone, ask me the things I was asked?

The answer is simple. I was and am vulnerable, and my wife was not present.

Had she been around, not a single question would have been asked.

It’s so sad and I will go more into the trouble with family members and boundaries in a future post.

Until then, be well.

6 thoughts on “Setting Boundaries And Having Them Respected Leave a comment

  1. While I’m not a Christian, I found “Boundaries” by Townsend & Cloud pretty helpful.

    I’ve met with a lot of resistance by family who do indeed claim to love me. I think part of it is family dysfunction, another part is toxic elements of my culture — and perhaps “why” doesn’t matter, just that they get angry at reasonable boundaries.

    It is sad your family doesn’t respect your boundaries. How they’re reacting is definitely very telling about how they see you, and you don’t deserve that. 🙂

    Like

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